Are You Struggling to Find And Sustain Fulfilling Relationships?
- Do you spend a considerable amount of time arguing with people in your head?
- Does it seem like he or she doesn’t love you anymore?
- As a couple, are you experiencing more bad times than good?
- Is your relationship draining your energy and happiness?
- Are you having a difficult time getting through to your child(ren)?
- Are your parents, in-laws, or siblings wearing down your patience?
Feeling disconnected or experiencing consistent discord in a significant relationship can be a frustrating and confusing experience. Loving relationships often provide safety, comfort, joy, and purpose, but when they turn sour, the opposite effects occur, causing heavy feelings of sadness and/or dread. You may not know whether the relationship is serving you or how to move forward. Whether you’re single, experiencing familial tensions, workplace conflicts, or feeling stuck in a strained romantic relationship, you may be close to giving up, wondering if a fulfilling connection is even possible.
Relationship Problems Are Very Common
It’s completely normal to occasionally become irritated, have disagreements, and face challenges with people who are close to you. Humans are naturally social. From birth, you are driven to connect and communicate. So, if you’re having trouble being open and honest, it’s normal to feel insecure, lonely, or a little lost.
As with all issues, it’s best to identify the underlying causes early, because small conflicts can grow. In my experience, smart people are good at ignoring or excusing relationship problems. The more you consider conversations and scenarios in your head, the more distance you create between you and that person. At this point, bridging that gap may feel insurmountable. And, your friends and family may not understand what you’re going through. You may even worry they are growing impatient with you.
The good news is that therapy can help slow down your thinking, consider issues objectively, and strategize solutions.
Relationship Therapy Can Help You Heal
Relationship therapy provides the opportunity for you to closely examine your communication skills and family history in order to discover underlying causes of your discord and distress. As you develop deeper insights into your relationships, you can experience greater freedom about how to navigate issues now and in the future.
Interestingly, unhealthy relationship dynamics are often hinged on bad behaviors. So, much of our work will focus on untangling and reshaping unhelpful habits. For example, if one partner is drinking excessively, the other often finds ways to cope. When the drinker sobers up, you both may be surprised to find that life at home remains unhappy. Skilled counseling can help you become aware of these dynamics and replace them with new ways of thinking and being.
In a safe, confidential space, outside the stressors of everyday life, you and your partner can express yourselves openly and receive objective guidance from a professional who understands what you’re going through. My interdisciplinary Ph.D. program included a focus on marriage and family therapy, so I am well-versed and trained in a variety of approaches. Family relationships are living, changing, complex systems, and it takes a considerable amount of training and experience to work with them.
With the right guidance and support, it’s possible to navigate relationship issues with increased awareness, resiliency, and care, and cultivate a more satisfying connection.
You may have additional questions or concerns about marriage counseling…
My partner refuses to come to therapy.
I work with individuals and couples. So, if your partner doesn’t want to come to therapy, I am happy to work with you individually.
However, couples counseling can be incredibly beneficial when both partners are present. I have an easy-going nature and am very good at working with reluctant partners.
Successful people often seek out expert advice on a variety of issues. If your partner has an accountant, lawyer, or physician, I encourage you to frame therapy like this: a problem that requires expert care. Plus, finding sustainable solutions and learning more about yourself can feel really good.
What about problems with children or step-children?
Relationships with children and stepchildren can be the toughest and most rewarding. I spent seven years counseling difficult teenagers, while raising two of my own. With all my experience, I have a depth of knowledge of the adolescent mind and how it affects family life. I’m happy to help you develop new, healthy ways to handle challenging children.
Additionally, I have colleagues who specialize in children with behavior issues, and I can make referrals as needed. You might be surprised how much counseling can improve your relationship(s) with your son(s) or daughter(s). In some instances, I am willing to work one-on-one with adolescents as well.
I’m worried my partner will blame everything on me.
Relationship problems usually result from mutual bad habits, so blaming someone else is not helpful. Humans make mistakes and say foolish things, especially when angry or frightened. Together, we can figure out the nature of your unhappy “dance,” and unpack destructive patterns.
If there has been an affair, betrayal, abuse, or addiction, then we will need to address those circumstances. As an adult, you must be accountable for your mistakes and committed to finding resolutions. If both people are committed to therapy, the results can be incredibly positive and profound.
Create A Loving Bond
If you have additional questions about marriage and family therapy, I invite you to contact me or call (303) 449-4162 to arrange a free 15-minute consultation. My office is located in Greenwood Village, CO. I’m happy to speak with you about how couples counseling can help you enjoy a better life.